ROSE TINTED MEMORIES OF GLASGOW’S DREAMING SPIRES AKA GOT TO GET MY LEARN’ ON AKA HISTORY, IDENTITY AND LOW QUALITY MEAT PRODUCTS AKA LEMMINGS ON THE MARCH AKA GRIST TO THE MILL AKA HASH MUNCHIN’ MOMMA AKA CARELESS TALK COSTS LIVES AKA CHAPTER ONE: TOWARDS A PSYCHOGEOGRAPHY OF THE MFA.
A guided tour of the architectural delights surrounding the impressive facade of the Harry Barnes Building. Lets take a stroll. The most important site for the connoisseur of the ‘Glasgow Style’ is the large food and entertainment complex situated roughly opposite the Barnes Building. Paying a handsome compliment to the glories of Eastern bloc modernist invention, the elegant simplicity of this building delights the eye.With it’s sloping corrugated roof and breeze block interior it is a must see. For those cursed with long cultural memories, it will be hard not to shed a tear when recalling one of the early retail inhabitants – the revolutionary Shop Rite emporium. Critics and base detractors may argue that it’s stunningly simple display systems focused on utilitarian ends at the expense of aesthetic concerns but I always found the Shop Rite experience akin to flicking myself off to slingbacked LD426 easy chair.
Extract from the unpublished book “Reams on Eames” by Dr F L Panza.
CHAPTER TWO: THE NEW HYBRIDITY – EGG AND CHIP CURRY
The original recipe as prepared by Sunil Gawde, an exchange student from Bombay, on the evening of November 10th 1996. It was a night we shall never, never forget.
12 large eggs, hard boiled and shelled. 3 large fistfuls of McCain frozen oven chips 1 large onion, finely chopped 6 cloves of garlic 3 tbsps ghee 1 tbsp paprika 1 tbsp turmeric 2 tbsps allspice 2 tbsps chili powder 1tbsp ground coriander 2 cinnamon sticks 1 tbsp tomato puree I pint of water 6 whole cloves 2 inch cube of root ginger 3 green cardamoms 5 dried chillies Generous helping of salt and pepper Combine all spices etc with ghee, onion and tomato. Make a paste. Cook on a high heat for a bit. Add water and eggs. Simmer for 30 minutes. Add oven chips and allow to simmer on a low heat for a further 30 minutes. Serve atop a bed of rice with a side plate of salted oven chips.
CHAPTER THREE: BERLIN DROP OUT BOOGIE
Yes, that is correct dear reader it is time for another trip down memory lane to see who can remember these seminal moments from the glorious 1996 Berlin junket. 1. Peach Schnapps, Connect Four and the Berlin Gay scene? 2. Our defiant leader, closely followed by several of her loyal aides de camp, stumbles into a whole lotta building site bovver? 3. The doomed assault on an unsuspecting East German arts development agency? 4. Cafe society individualism versus herd mentality brutalism?
CHAPTER FOUR WHERE ARE THEY NOW?
Rob Kelly – top Winnipeg hoser, who famously smashed a pint glass over his own head and was severely ticked off by Emeritus Prof Gordon.
Malcolm – last heard of heading for NASA headquarters after receiving coded instructions via his collosal antenna constructed entirely from hammered flat baked bean tins.
Sunil Gawde – India’s top businessman and exponent of the ‘Swirling Blades School of Abstract Painting’. When he wasn’t rolling on the floor laughing hysterically at our shoddy workmanship, he was holding our hands, touching our hearts and exploiting our labour.
Norrie – a raconteur whose unique stylings left one breathless.
Shannon – tireless Californian champion of the down trodden masses who showed us the way of the book and ‘elped us all to get our learn’ on.